Monday, 29th of April, 2023 • TDP • #camping

Have you ever been camping?

—Questioner

Short answer? Yes.

Long answer… I’m not very good at it, but I have a few lovely memories.

Canopy of Stars by: Aaron Bedell

One time I have truly enjoyed camping was with friends in college. A few of us had trucks & I had a Jeep Cherokee Laredo that I could lay the back seats down & put a twin mattress in the back, which would be for my friends who hated the outdoors altogether & needed a roof. We put down mattresses in all the other truck beds & parked in a circle with the truck beds toward the center – where we had a lovely fire.

Open Season Campfire by: Art Licensing Studio

I need to get better at the outdoors. My spine tends to disagree with sleeping on the ground, as Degenerative Disc Disease, spinal stenosis, & metal on C4-C7, react poorly to the Mother Earth Mattress. One of my “to-do’s” is learning basic survival skills; not certain when that training will begin.
∞Cecelia

Caturday • 27.April.24 • When reality sets in… 🥺

{pain} 4 • thankfully began stretching again today & can immediately feel the difference. {sleep} I don’t effin’ know & that pisses me off. Apple still has not fixed the issues with the last update.

Anatomy of Human Ear #1 by: TriFocal Communications

I went to the ENT (Ear, Nose, & Throat) doctor yesterday. She checked me out & said that she thinks two things are going on… one is my Eustachian tube not doing its job properly. Second, & probably more important, it seems as though I am clenching my jaw at night and possibly during the day as well.

Recall I have Trigeminal Neuralgia on both sides of my face, which makes it impossible to tell if I have an ear infection or if it’s just the pain from TN. I also have jaw pain from TN on the reg, therefore – I wouldn’t notice if I wake up clenching my jaw at night. (& I do wake up at 3am & 6am every freakin’ morning due to 🐈‍⬛). There are times when the pain from TN comes that I do clench my jaw as I massage it to get through the pain.

Divided by: Mario Sanchez Nevado

It takes time to process information, especially info that may point the finger at my mental health. I have been surviving Major Depressive Disorder for quite a bit this time. [It began in college & has come & go in phases through my life]. This last go-around probably began in November of 2021 when my daughter’s best friend died in a car accident. For two years I focused on her mental health & ignored how I was feeling.

I should have known better.

We Don’t Talk About That by: Raymond Delgado

Just like now – I should have realized that clenching my jaw at night & during the day off & on is a result of stress & reaction of my body to depression. It happened once before, I clenched my jaw so badly I thought I had TMJ. That followed a severe break-up & I was *surprise, surprise* severely depressed.

Please don’t misunderstand, I didn’t think I was ‘cured’, by no means; like I said, I’ve been here before. I understand that it’s all a process & what the process needs the most is ‘time’ with counseling & self-reflection & oftentimes medication.

It is incredibly frustrating.

Man With Face in a Vise Drawing by: CSA Images

If you’re in the same boat mentally, emotionally, please know that you’re not alone. There are many like us, who are surviving through the same muck & mire. Hopefully you too are going to counseling, perhaps with a psychologist & also a psychiatrist – maybe a therapist, mayb a group… if not, you can always text 988 if you find yourself in a dark place.

With that I say, talk soon.
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙

Post Script: Some Caturday pics for you… with love, Lady Diana 🐈‍⬛🐾

Quite a day for justice… in the year of accountability. • Happy Thor’s day.⚡️

*Content Warning – S.A. & war*

So many legal events occurring today as well as surprise indictments from Arizona for those fake electors in the 2020 election; & Arizona’s third attempt to repeal their archaic abortion law. The Supreme Court heard oral arguments about “absolute presidential immunity” – even though the creation of our country was a direct response to ‘absolute monarchical immunity’. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Supreme Court Justices Say To A Man Approaching by: Paul Noth
Published in the New Yorker 21.Sept.15

If you’re following what is happening in Gaza, Hamas says they would lay down their arms if an independent Palestinian state is established. According to the AP, “the Islamic militant group is willing to agree to a truce of five years or more with Israel & that it would lay down its weapons & convert into a political party if an independent Palestinian state is established along pre-1967 borders.”

It is unlikely anything will come of it. Israel has vowed to destroy Hamas in retaliation for the attacks of October 7th & Netanyahu is opposed to the creation of a Palestinian state. (Sewell, 25.April.24, AP)

We shall return
From the destruction and hatred you sow
From every inch of our land
That hosted a martyr
We shall return
Despite of your killing and brutality and the collaboration of traitors who sold out
helping to realize your schemes in our Palestine
We shall return to our land to the land of our ancestors!
by: Imad Abu shtayyah

Back home in the US, the New York Court of Appeals overturned the 2020 rape conviction of Harvey Weinstein. The Court said, “prosecutors in the pivotal #MeToo case called witnesses whose accusations were not part of the charges against him.” That, apparently, meant that he was “unfairly tried for past behaviour.” The court has ordered a new trial. Thankfully, Weinstein remains in prison as he was convicted of rape in LA.

The Issue
“What is the issue? Government, money, abuse, SILENCE?
We’ve been silent for many reasons, but the issue is surfacing.
Silence No More!”
by: Jounda Strong

Climate Change & Sustainability News (nothing new, but really, I mean we REALLY should boycott all of these brands until they realize they’re not doing enough to mitigate their destruction of our world).
Axios reports, “Fifty-six brands led by The Coca-Cola Company are responsible for more than half of the plastic pollution found across the globe, according to a new study.”

The top five ar§holes?
1. Coca-Cola (11%)
2. PepsiCo (5%)
3. Nestlé (3%)
4. Danone (3%)
5. Altria (2%)

Great Pacific Garbage Patches by: NOAA Marine Debris Program

The above illustration shows the locations of the garbage patches in the Pacific Ocean: the Western Garbage Patch, the Eastern Garbage Patch, and the Subtropical Convergence Zone. “These large rotating ocean currents (gyres) contain marine debris particles and are characterized by exceptionally high concentrations of plastics, chemical sludge, and other debris that have become trapped by the currents of the North Pacific Current.” (Source: NOAA)

Hope you enjoyed this short rundown of what’s going on in the world today.
🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia ✌🏻🌊💙

Wednesday, 24th of April, 2024 • TDP • #WorthyRisk

Describe a risk you took that you do not regret.

—Questioner

Dear Questioner, this relates to my answer just the other day… moving to Illinois, where we had no friends or family other than my mom & stepdad, who were truck drivers & never home. The Oklahoma we left behind was markedly different than what it has become over the last decade in so many ways. Several times I have been reflective of the past, or confronted by events, in which I have pondered where we would be had we not left Oklahoma.

No Regrets by: Pam Holdsworth A quote by John Barrymore.

Mostly, I think about what Roegn would be like had we not left. First, she would have a southern accent. Honestly, that would have annoyed me, but wouldn’t have been irreconcilable. Second, I would have had a more difficult time battling the ‘Republican mindset’ as we would have been surrounded by family & friends that were on the right. That would have made 2016 intolerable. I mean, that’s why I’m not on facebook much anymore • 2016 was the beginning of a chasm between myself & many of my friends and family.

Explore Yourself
“Self Portrait Study, me drawing myself. The only way to truly know yourself is to study & examine yourself from every conceivable angle. But you must also keep in mind that we are never the same person from one moment to the next.”
by: Amber Ryder

Third, she would not have had the freedom to swim through her identity as she grew up. As we saw with the death of Nex Benedict, people who are different are bullied with impunity in Oklahoma. Roe has always been influenced excessively by her environment, which is why she didn’t go to public school – even here in Illinois. It took me over 18 years to help her understand that she is worthy of being herself & not someone others want her to be (even me). I honestly believe that had we stayed in Oklahoma she would have been hit from every side NOT to be who she wanted to be, but to be what THEY wanted her to be.

In that instance, I would have been forced to be overtly leftist & probably would have been more radical in order to balance the information coming from family, school, church, local government, and the news.

By: Studio Grafikka

The risk? We moved to a place where we didn’t have friends, family, or know anyone within a 3 hour drive… eventually more, closest being 6 hours away. This was not new to me, as I was raised a nomad, and because of that attempted to keep my daughter in the same place for most of her upbringing. Oddly enough, all the positives I had heard about growing up in one place ended up not being what my daughter experienced, but that’s another story for a different time.
∞Cecelia

Step of Faith by: Pennie Mirande

Monday, 22nd of April, 2024 • TDP • #Nervous

What makes you nervous?

—Questioner

Well, dear Questioner, before June 2022 my answer would have been, “very little.” However, once the highest court in our land decided to take away a woman’s right to choose, incurring the ramifications many of us could see coming, I became ‘nervous’ about many political issues I had no reason to consider before.

Vote by: Matt Faulkner Illustration

A conservative Supreme Court has the ability to change our lives in a myriad of ways – especially now that they have jumped off the cliff by taking away a right for the first time in our country’s history.

New Yorker 3.May.22 by: Brooke Bourgeois

Immediately following the SCOTUS decision to repeal Roe, I thought about marriage equality & all my LGBTQ+ friends who have gotten married as a result of the Obergefell decision in 2015. If we are honest, the only reason they have not publicly discussed inter-racial marriage is because Justice Thomas is married to a white woman; that came to my mind immediately as my best friend, a black woman, is married to a white man. If they could take down something like Roe v. Wade, which had stood for longer than 50 years, they could take anything.

It’s Time – Equal Rights For All by: Sharon Cummings

We have seen it with the arguments over Mifepristone – the far right have zero scruples & will do anything in order to progress their agenda. Please do not think that includes actually being “Pro-Life” as they are merely “Pro-Birth”; once the child is born they are not interested in supporting them at all. Which harkens back to the original point of anxiety, which was the overturning of Roe v. Wade.

Women’s Conference, 1977 Houston, Texas by: Granger

Unfortunately, it seems we are in a time of fighting for our rights (again) & must continue to do so, which means a constant anxiety or nervousness. It seems as though we must never become complacent, constantly on edge, or the patriarchy will take advantage. Prayerfully, they can feel the rumble as the Blue Wave grows to Roevember…
∞Cecelia

Saturday, 20th of April, 2024 • TDP • #SocialMedia

How do you use social media?

—Questioner

Dear Questioner, how I wish I could answer, “very carefully”, as we all know it is very bad for us. However, just like the myriad of things we consume that are bad for us, often in spite of their awfulness (i.e. alcohol, cigarettes, vape, etc.) …social media is something that gets thrown into the “blessing & curse” category. Here’s a brief history of my social media usage…

I began, like so many, with a MySpace & Facebook account. Personally, I enjoyed MySpace more; there was more going on, you had a personal page to deck out, & there was music! Honestly, I don’t know why MySpace died, it was much better than simply writing a line of text… etc., but I digress.

Eventually there was twitter, something which I avoided for as long as possible. I never had much of a life on twitter, occasionally I would go on to see what celebrities or athletes were doing.

Slowly facebook took over and by 2016 it was the major social media site I personally utilized. It had become the place I would keep up with my family, who are spread out throughout the US, and many friends from high school & college. However, the political nightmare that ensued caused me to spend less and less time on facebook.

Guess Who’s by: Ian Young

Instagram became a time waster at some point…

By the time Elmo bought twitter & proceeded to dismantle it piece by piece, I was never on the platform. It was incredibly easy for me to erase my account.

Enter threads.

Since the start of the threads platform, I have been involved in creating & sustaining the Blue Wave. Hopefully we will continue to grow ••• I do not spend much time on any other platform.

Friday, the 19th of April, 2024 • TDP • #FirstThought

Jot down the first thing that comes to your mind.

—Questioner

••• The eagle is landing. •••


((My Ma is in town))
We will see how the days go, yeah?

Thor’s day • Threads Thursday • End of special torture week.

{pain} 3 • I’m stretching, or attempting to remember to do so every day. Finally had my blood draw for the allergy test and was able to take my Allegra & Cingular after. I still have the head ache (5 days now) which should go away by tonight, I think.

Vigo County Historical Museum Terre Haute, Indiana by: Jack Schultz

Roegn & I went to Terre Haute yesterday to visit the IRS; my poor girl, she is dealing with identity theft! Someone sent in a paper filing with her social security number; so now she had to go to the IRS, prove who she was, and now must also file by paper (to give them time to deal with the imposter). She has continually mentioned that ‘adulting has completely sucked’ & she ‘doesn’t want anything to do with growing up’ – which is just so whiny! I think about what I was doing at her age & think, damn, she just needs to grow up!

Terre De Haute by: Greg Dyro

Then I remember that we continue to move through our grief. Let me be clear, I’ve had her in therapy for years; having a friend die was not the initial reason Roe was in counseling. It has taken a very long time for her to be able to admit that she had not fully worked through or processed her grief over Jaime’s death.

Well, I’m going to stop there • there’s no need to delve deeply into the depths of depression & bad memories.

Quick question: Are you using threads? You can find me @sustain.able.future • we are building up a blue wave! It’s important to stay informed, especially in the times we are living through. It may not seem like it, but we are in historic times. We are also building a community of people who care about each other & want to build each other up – we are uninterested in tearing people down. Hope to see you there!

🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙

👉🏻Here are some of my favourites from threads🧵 this week:

Wednesday, 17th of April, 2024 • TDP • #DecisionMade

Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow.

—Questioner

Good morning, dear Questioner. This is a difficult question, only in that I have so many to choose from – as I have made so many mistakes, I have learned much. (I believe we learn more from our mistakes). So when I think back through what I have learned, the decisions I have made…

A couple years after we moved to Illinois.

Just over a decade ago, things were not going well between Roegn & me, we were growing apart. This was not a natural process, my sister was doing a masterful job of manipulating Roe into despising me… later she admitted to wanting to come between us. Around this time, my Ma needed surgery that required a long recovery time in which she needed help & her husband needed to stay on the road. I was homeschooling Roe at the time, so it was easy for us to travel from Oklahoma to Illinois & stay for a while.

September, 2023

Getting away from the influence of my sister was a weight lifted from our relationship. I will not say that everything was perfect right away, because quite the opposite… we went through hell for a few years. However, had we stayed in Oklahoma, I know we would not have the relationship we have now. The decision to move to Illinois was not easy, the consequences were many; the road was long, the journey difficult & it’s certainly not over. We work on our relationship constantly.

Roe’s my best friend and the most amazing kid a mama could have. Having to make that decision was incredibly difficult, mostly because we moved away from our “village” of family to a place where we knew no one. It helped me understand boundaries better & that I’m allowed to draw certain lines in order to make my & my daughter’s lives better.

Keep In Touch by: Darlene Graeser
https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/darlene-graeser

Unfortunately, it also taught me lessons I’m still dealing with, like how important it is to keep in touch with relatives that are far away. Yeah, both Roe & I still work on that one.

∞Cecelia

Gov. Pritzker pushes plan to wipe out $1 billion in medical debt for Illinoisans

https://ift.tt/JCyXwO4 Cook County resident John Cook is one of 200,000 residents whose medical debt has been eliminated via a Cook County Board …

Gov. Pritzker pushes plan to wipe out $1 billion in medical debt for Illinoisans

Stormy with a Chance of Jail Time. • Tax Day • The Ides of April

{pain} generally okay, but living without allergy medicine & one of my asthma meds is a special kind of torture. I’m wheezy with a strong chance of snot. (I’m definitely in a Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs kind of mood). I have had a head ache for days, I’m coughing up nastiness, & each time Lady Diana comes near my face I feel my lungs. This process sucks.

Billboard for Michael Cohen by: Ellis Rosen
published in the New Yorker 9.April.18

Today is the first day of the first criminal trial of a sitting or former U.S. president. We never thought we would get to this point, the time it has taken to get here seems to have passed as molasses through the hour glass. Here is a quick rundown of the case from a criminal defense attorney I appreciate, CLRBruceRivers (a 38m watch).

United States Courthouse NYC by: Jerry Fornarotto

This process is going to take longer than we’d like. The anatomy of a trial is this:
• Jury Selection. They’re calling 500 New York citizens for jury selection in their attempt to find 18 people (12 jurors with 6 alternates) who say they can be objective.
• NY State opening statement.
• Defense can either offer an opening statement or reserve the right to do so after the prosecution rests their case.
• Prosecution lays out their case through the calling of witnesses & evidence.
• Defense cross examines
• State rests; usually the defense will make a motion for acquittal.
• Defense presents their case, witnesses, evidence.
• State cross-examines.
• Defense rests; state can present rebuttal witnesses.
• State closing arguments.
• Defense closing arguments.
• State has the option of a short rebuttal.

A Killer Whale Is In Court by: Jack Ziegler
published in the New Yorker 26.May.08

Trump is charged with 34 counts of falsifying business records to cover up other crimes. Those crimes included paying off two women to keep them silent as well as payments to news agencies to kill the stories and disguising the payments as legal fees. Michael Cohen went to jail for these crimes. There are also tax issues, campaign finance issues, and other federal charges involved.

The most serious infraction, really, is how he’s treated the judicial system, and people within it, specific people – like the judge’s daughter.

Bruce Rivers, Criminal Lawyer

Not certain if I will continue to cover this so closely. If you’d like to see how both sides are covering the trial, you should go to ground.news – which is the absolute best place to get your news. It gives you the bare facts of the story, then access to many news outlets across the political spectrum – left to right, so you can see how everyone is covering the story.

New Yorker April 4, 2023 by: Adam Douglas Thompson

Today will be full of more laundry & cleaning for me; I took a break yesterday, living with chronic pain means stretching out every day tasks. I’m moving much more slowly as a result of the snot clouding my brain, which is making typing this much more difficult than it should be. Ugh. On that note, I’m going to wish you a quick Monday.

🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia ✌🏻🌊💙

Weekender • Red Alert • Eagle Incoming!

{pain} 3 • I’m feeling rather okayish; my ear continues to hurt (my left ear remains infected).

Welcome to the weekend! My ma (aka Eagle) will be here at the house this week, probably around Wednesday or Thursday.

Super excited🙄.

Perhaps this is the fire I needed to get me going? (Typed whilst drinking coffee, sitting in bed, ugh). Okay, fine. Gimme a sec, I need to go start a load of laundry.

Alrighty… so, when separating our clothes I have noticed time & again that our black/navy pile is ginormous! We have three loads of black/navy clothes that does not include pants! Somehow I have allowed several mounds to grow into their own mountains ••• I will be lost within the flowery sniffs of clothes for the next several hours…

Loneliness by: Patrick Odorizzi
https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/1x

I have decided that my first major podcast with be about loneliness & how we as a society are not dealing with it. Well, that’s not true. I have to re-record my introductory video to include Jack & the Daily Beans, which I hope to do with a dear friend of mine (who just broke her leg stepping off her deck ~random tangent) first.

More & more recently I have noticed articles about people being lonely as well as an increase in articles about social anxiety & and failure of our society in general over the last decade or more. It will be a good way to introduce the peer counseling service, which eventually will also be available online. [I need to work on that script today – good times.]

Laundry 1 by: Ali Chris

Today is National Scrabble Day – I’m grateful for the OG of word games. I remember the first time I beat my Ma • I felt so proud of myself bc my Ma was a master at Scrabble. As my vocabulary expanded, it was more fun to play. Speaking of my Ma, I need to get going. I have a list of things to accomplish before she lands.

Hope your Caturday is going well! Below you can see Lady Diana is enjoying herself… she’s quite spoiled.

🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙

National Erase Self-Negativity Day • Hump Day • Just effin’ get out of bed… ugh. oops.

{pain} 4 – back to the usual neck, shoulders, & left arm.

Happy Wednesday, dear friends. Is it just me or have you felt ultra lazy this week? I’ve had to force myself to do anything, to include eating; surviving on coffee has been my jam. If you’ve read this blog for a while you’ll know I tend to speak ‘firmly’ to myself – some sincere self-negativity at times. I have a tendency to allow my self-deprecation to morph into self-negativity.

Today is National Erase Self-Negativity Day • which includes (but is not limited to) erasing negative self-talk & replacing it with positive self-talk. It’s important that we teach our kids positive self-talk so that they can become more resilient & simply love themselves more; but it’s also incredibly important for adults to remember to do these things. (Or perhaps learn them anew?)

https://www.calmsage.com/positive-self-talk/

It’s also National Siblings Day – so give yours a call, eh? Whether by blood, adoption, fostering, or just those you’ve created on your own • give love to your siblings! And National Encourage a Young Writer Day, among others that you can see here. The idea is to be kind on purpose, friends.

Talk Soon,
Cecelia

Two Sisters by: Pierre Auguste Renoir or On The Terrace, 1881

https://leverageedu.com/discover/trending-events/encourage-a-young-writer-day/

🎶Total Eclipse of the Sun🎶 • Really need to get outside & touch grass.

{pain} 3 • though I’ve had head aches, which is annoying.

The “Ring Of Fire” Matrix by: Tengyu Cai
https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/1x

It’s a bit terrifying that it has taken a celestial event to get me outside & moving around. Do you have any special eclipse plans? I know of several parties going on – looks like too many people to me// just cannot handle that on a Monday. Our little touristy town is just on the outside of the path of totality; though we do not have the infrastructure for an influx of people. I’m hoping that doesn’t happen.

We are planning to go downtown & see if there are any solar eclipse glasses, as I planned to create a pinhole projector. So, I’m gonna get up & get going…

Eclipse Zone of Totality Vermont by: Lorraine Zaloom
https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/lorraine-zaloom

There shouldn’t be any cows jumping over the sun/moon eclipse today, but we might see something crazy hereabouts. I look forward to adding to this post at some point, or perhaps just catching up tomorrow. Wishing you all the best & please have a safe & happy solar eclipse!

🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙

Eclipses 1 by: Daniel Patrick Kessler
https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/artlicensing

Fri•high•day •

{pain} 5 – I’ve been eating too much… we ordered too much pizza whilst eating our feelings.

Solar Eclipse by: Jennifer Lommers

Happy Friday, high-day! Monday is the eclipse & we are in the path of totality…

…located right off the Interstate & have over 10 world record attractions.

We do not have the infrastructure to accommodate the number of people I fear may decide to come here to spend their solar eclipse.

The Path of Totality by: Vadim Ianulionoc

I was finally able to catch up with my best friend yesterday. Our two hour conversation wasn’t nearly enough, but it was a great beginning. Her life has been absolutely insane the past year & I’ve been ill most of the time. I’m going to go ahead & post this – I have a head ache that is clogging my brain.

🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙

Here are a few favourites snagged from threads today:

Am I just deep in lazy, ‘rainy day’ blues… or is this serious?

{pain} 6 – mostly due to inactivity. I must get back into a good routine.

Snagged off Threads

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while you’ll know that I’ve been crawling my way out from Major Depressive Disorder ••• a path I have traversed before, beginning in college. I’m currently in therapy & on medication… yet I struggle. The journey of depression is rife with high highs & low lows… and when you find yourself stuck in a rut (same thing happening over & over, or simply just petrification) it seems overwhelming. What’s worse, if you have family or friends who are either enablers by nature, enduring depression themselves, or avoidance specialists, your behavior could be mirrored in others.

Depression by: Bildagentur-online/ohde/science Photo Library

For example, my daughter Roegn has also been struggling with depression for a few years now. We both are struggling with simply getting out of bed… let alone work, school, blog, podcast, etc. Often I think that if only one other person would join our efforts, perhaps that would ignite the fire beneath our arses. Perhaps I just need to get up myself, get going, & push my daughter to do the same. But that’s just so difficult at this moment.

The Tentacles of Major Depression by: MB Dallocchio

We are beginning a peer counseling group that will meet in person here in Casey, but also online if there’s a need. If you’re interested in peer counseling, which is best utilized in concert with your own therapy – as a building up of your support network.

You can email kafe.counseling@gmail.com with any questions. Hopefully we can build something beautiful.
🗣️Talk Soon,
Cecelia✌🏻🌊💙